Once in a Blue Moon

I can’t sleep

And my body aches

From carrying the weight of me,

And my mind wanders

In the dark and quiet.

 

You tell me that you are not snoring

But only moments ago your rumble

Was down my back and in my hair.

 

I get up to write.

I am a million miles into the sky

And some how still firmly planted here.

So many things I want to do,

To see,

To know.

 

Projects near complete,

Wait on the tips of my fingers.

What is it that stops me?

In the small hours,

With no distraction.

 

Fear.

Fear of failure.

Fear of rejection.

Fear of vulnerability.

I don’t care what you think of me –

As a person –

But my work,

That is another story all together.

A sword of criticism

For which I have no defense.

 

Out in the world I am fearless and open,

But here in the mirror of Blue Moon

I am fleshy and soft.